Mar 10, 2009

Greenhouse Effect

You came up with a nice cover and matched it with a nice center spread. In this issue I saw some good stories but many that had inappropriate and insufficient sourcing and which reflect lazy reporting.

And you reported on line how the Lady Jacks won 20 games for the FIRST TIME IN HISTORY but there was no mention of that in the paper. In that story online, you mostly quoted the coach when you needed to talk to the women on the team.

First the good

You pai
nted nice pieces about the Humboldt Crew team and the people on the track and field team.

Both had terrific ledes:
Not even a stomach ulcer can stop Varsity Rower Hannah Mills from waking up at 5:30 a.m. to do what she loves.
and
Sophomore Jasmine Seymour was the last woman standing in the high-jump competition. With two tries down and only one attempt let, she faced the horizontal bar measuring five feet and eight inches.
"I can't do it."


There were some nice online-only pieces as well.

Nice showing for the men's basketball story, although you buried the lede. What a difference 24 hours makes is cliche and always avoid cliche. Instead you should have lead with the free throws which Cheek says he will never forget. When reporting an action-packed game, slow down. Select just the best plays and show them to your reader in slow motion.

Now the Bad


Other stor
ies were convoluted and superficial. They suffered from poor sourcing. Your story is only as solid and thorough as your reporting. The parking story was a rehash of previous stories and gave the reader no new insight into a long-standing problem.
You buried the lede for it, as well:


It took Rhiana Jones 20 minutes to find a parking spot the other day. She left one lot, tried another and then had to return to the first before one opened up "It doesn't make sense that they sell more permits than available spots," she said.

In the story on emergency preparedness you failed to talk to any students on the CERT or any students concerned about the possibility of an earthquak
e or other emergency.

The lede on the KHSU story was long and tedious as was the rest of the story. You allowed Patrick Cleary to say little and even to keep secret the salary he will pay someone to run a non-profit, public university-owned radio station. When people give you blah blahs and gobbly-gook, force them to give you specifics that are meaningful to your readers.

Ask good questions:

What do you mean exactly?
How much exactly?
When exactly?
The story on broadband also suffered from poor sourcing. You needed to talk to students frustrated by slow connections. You also failed to give readers important information.

You mention that the governor cut red tape allowing the project to take off but you don't tell us what red tape an
d what you mean by the project taking off and when and how it will do so. When exactly will it start? When exactly will the cable
Don't confuse the news angle with the news
The Q&A with Lori Dengler focused on the award she won, when the reader doesn't care about awards. And you quoted a woman who never took her class rather than people who new her well. The trick to a good Q&A is that you need to report and write the introduction as you would a stand alone story -- it needs to explain to the reader why it is important they hear what the person says.

In the Q&A itself, Dengler says some interesting things but you fail to follow up. Instead
after she says she has been to obscure places and that she was a reluctant scientist you follow with a question about the award. Instead you should have asked her what obscure places be laid or the satellite dish installed and when exactly will residents get the new hookups? And why are you quoting the CIA factbook for this story?
and what they were like, and what did she mean by a reluctant scientist. That's how you get the anecdotes that bring a person to life.

You give us a short piece about Discovery Walks in Eureka, but you failed to take your readers on the walk.

And here again was a great opportunity for a map.

Finally, as in the intro to the Dengler Q&A, you quoted someone who hasn't been on one of the walking tours rather than someone who has.

No comments:

Email me!

at mib3@humboldt.edu

Marcy's Top Ten Rules

1. Use active verbs.
2. Don't be afraid to paraphrase.
3. Question the answers to the questions you ask.
4. Substance always adds to style.
5. Honesty overrides all other journalistic rules.
6. Accuracy is not the same as truth.
7. Getting two sides to a story is not the same as balance.
8. Show don't tell.
9. Write with all five senses.
10. Give voice to the voiceless.

Movies about newspaper reporters

  • Futureworld
  • Salvador
  • The Return of Doctor X
  • Missing
  • All the Presidents Men
  • Scoop
  • The Quiet American
  • Foreign Correspondent
  • Gentleman's Agreement
  • Under Fire
  • The Parallax View
  • The Mean Season
  • Defense of the Realm
  • Superman 1-7
  • The Front Page
  • His Girl Friday
  • The Year of Living Dangerously
  • The Killing Fields
  • Inherit the Wind
  • True Crime
  • The Paper
  • Deadline-USA
  • Call Northside 777